I am running a marathon, I am crazy...yup those two thoughts belong in the same sentence. Today is 8 weeks since I had my baby boy. This moment is actually 9 hours after I delivered Moses Kol. At precisely this moment in time 8 weeks ago, I was downing 3 Crumbs Bakery cupcakes that my darling friend Fay brought to the hospital for me to celebrate the birth, but mostly to celebrate the end of my gestational diabetes which prevented me from having any sweets during my pregnancy. (And they were not the mini ones either.) But I digress. I am running a marathon..well jogging..ok, maybe walking...no running, that’s my final answer. Running a marathon has always been on my list of things to do. Since I haven’t done anything over the last year while I was pregnant because I had really bad all-day sickness for the first 5 months. (Whoever named it ‘morning sickness’ obviously wasn’t a pregnant woman.)
I had no desire to pursue my career - I am a freelance make-up artist - and since I had no agent to speak of, it was all on me to hustle my little tush off. I was rather good at the hustling but it was hard work and sometimes the money was shit or non existent. But, I love make-up!! I love the feel of it, the feeling it brings to my clients, the bright colors, the different textures and yet, I have not applied make-up on anyone in MONTHS! I was pregnant, creating a human being and had no desire to create anything else in the world I lived in. It was strange and weird, it confused me and made me cry. My friend Molly told me, even though it seems like I have lost all creativity I am creating the most incredible thing I will ever create in my life, my child. I listened but did not hear her and wondered if I would ever want to paint again on canvas, or paint again on faces, or if I’d ever want to paint my world as bright as I used to.
And then the baby came. I was euphoric for 2 days and then reality hit and I was exhausted. Forget about being creative, I couldn’t think straight, I couldn’t think at all! And now it’s week 8. Moses Kol is healthy, thank god, he’s growing well and he makes my heart sing with his early morning smiles and cooing. Just as Molly promised, the creative juices started flowing. I am writing again. I want to create videos with friends. I am dancing again. I want to run a marathon... and so I signed up. The marathon is 2 ½ months away. The other girls have been training for 3 months already, but my sister Dee and my husband Dov believe I can do it. They believe in me and that is all I need. So even though I can not seem to get to any destination on time; and that includes my bed, I will be hopefully running (jogging or walking) a marathon 4 months after Moses Kol’s birth. So yes, I consider myself slightly crazy, but in a really healthy way. And this is a good thing because I have always thought of myself as a little crazy. So Molly, you were right, I am on my way to being myself again. Wooohooo!